The best Communicators are those who have a reasoning manner, simply because they encourage people to listen and think.
A dogmatic person tends to close minds and therefore loses any opportunity to pursue discussion.
The Greek word for reasonable literally means “Yielding” and so for many it would be seen as weak.
The opposite would be to have a belligerent attitude.
To yield simply suggests you value someone else’s views enough to hear them which will make them more receptive.
You might disagree but being disagreeable is not the solution. You don’t need to challenge every statement as wrong but rather find the “common ground” you share and build from there.
People have the right of choice so offering a thought provoking point will leave people thinking.
It maintains some groundwork for constructive discussion on another occasion.
Having a reasoning mind means you need to need think more deeply.
Try this as a genuine example.
A colleague told me recently that they were hurt and disappointed because a Friend had said no to a kind gesture that they had offered.
How would you suggest a resolution?
Firstly, look for positive reasons, not negative ones.
Don’t think of the situation as a rejection.
It’s at least possible that the receiver did not want to be seen as a “taker”, preferring not to put on a friends good nature. Perhaps they are just being respectful.
Here was the compromise solution that worked.
Explaining that the gesture was made in all sincerity, the intent was that only one reward was hoped for.
That the receiver would make the giver very happy, adding joy to their day by accepting the offer.
So, the argument in not accepting the gesture was to sadden the giver.
The receiver therefore was not simply receiving but was in fact giving more pleasure back.
The reasoned point was convincing and both benefitted by agreement.
We seem at times to have lost our ability to find simple solutions but in truth they can be found with a little extra thinking.
There’s a true saying that says “It’s not what you know – it’s how you feel about what you know that matters”
Don’t shut your feelings off when looking for solutions because feelings make a thing more real and natural. If you are really committed to something or someone you will never let obstacles get in the way.
In life, in business, in relationships....the same principles work if they are unselfish.
A bad attitude produces bad outcomes whilst a good attitude produces long lasting benefits for everyone.
